Planning for death

Death and funerals are not something that people generally like to talk about. Certainly if the topics are raised they are often followed by moments of silence as if the thought of our own mortality had already crept in and started to make a home. I am socially aware of why they might not be the most appropriate dinner conversation but I have never understood why when they come up we treat the topic like a disease that needs to be cut out.

This weekend I attended the funeral of the grandfather of a friend who lives in Kagiso and was once again inspired by the nobility and humanity that we can demonstrate in times of pain and grief. The church building itself was in the process of being extended and whilst there were a few window frames without windows and a few light fixtures without lights none of this mattered as the several hundred people focused on the story of the man who had passed away. A neighbour stood up and spoke about their actions in the community, their kindness to the children in the neighbourhood, a lay-priest spoke about their attendance at church for many years and their willing participation in all aspects of church affairs; attendance at services, contributions and support activities. Another lady stood up and spoke about the importance of faith and then proceeded to sing Amazing Grace in a beautiful voice that had the congregation interjecting with cries of Amen and Thank you Lord. It made me think about life and the purpose of life.

After the burial we went back to the family home for some refreshments and there were family and friends of the deceased welcoming people, serving them lunch and encouraging everyone to be social. It made me think about the power of faith to remove difficulties and pain, perhaps not at first at a physical level but certainly at a spiritual and emotional level which then shapes the way we act and somehow that fixes the physical too.

As a Baha'i I believe in many worlds of God beyond this world and that my physical experiences on earth are in fact opportunities to develop spiritual capacities for the next world. There is a quote in the Baha'i Writings that says: "The more we search for ourselves, the less likely we are to find ourselves; and the more we search for God, and to serve our fellowman, the more profoundly will we become acquainted with ourselves, and the more inwardly assured. This is one of the great spiritual laws of life." At this funeral this Writing made a bit more sense because what was important to the deceased's family and friends were the memories of what the deceased had done for others, how they helped the community, how other people's lives had been enriched by their actions and it was these things that defined the deceased.

I think death is an important experience of life. A funeral provides us with an opportunity to acknowledge who we are collectively and individually. When it is my turn to be released from "this mortal coil" I pray to have been steadfast to one of the great spiritual laws of life.